By Inez Barberio
Relationship expert, motivational speaker, mother and wife, Siggy Flicker knows what it takes to live life to the fullest.
Through all the love, laughter, and public tears, Siggy Flicker has no fear of letting the world know who she is. The author of ‘Write Your Own Fairy Tale: The New Rules for Dating, Relationships, and Finding Love on Your Terms,’ Flicker shares to the world what it means to know your own worth. After appearing as a guest on numerous talk shows, starring on the VH1 show ‘Why are You Still Single,’ and most recently a cast member of ‘The Real Housewives of New Jersey,’ Flicker admits that she faced multiple rejections throughout her life before her own fairy tale came true.
Flicker explained, “like anything else, when rejection slaps me in the face, I find another way of getting up and pushing forward. I tell people, 90% of life is just showing up!”
After facing rejection when her VH1 show did not get renewed for a second season, Flicker didn’t stay down. She kept showing up on various talk shows including ‘Dr. Phil,’ ‘Good Morning America,’ ‘The Today Show,’ CNN and ‘Fox and Friends.’ There was one special ‘Jersey Girl’ that kept Flicker relevant by having her continuously on as a guest on her successful talk show, Wendy Williams.
Flicker credits Wendy Williams for believing in her.
“In this industry to have another female look at you and say, ‘hey, I like something about you,’ it’s women empowering women and not being intimidated by other women. I am very appreciative and grateful for Wendy Williams for having me on her show.”
Flicker is a woman who truly practices what she preaches. She lives her life by bringing other people up and helping other women succeed. She is loud, funny, raw and real. At the same time, she puts her family first and continues to grow as a loving person full of positive energy.
So, why would someone with such high positive spirits join the cast of Bravo’s ‘The Real Housewives of New Jersey’, known for its toxic drama?
“I was approached by Jacqueline Laurita, who said that Jersey was coming back. My first reaction was that I could never do a show like that. However, once I got thinking about it, and I thought about the platform, and how much I really love Jersey, something changed.”
Growing up in New Jersey, Flicker was upset on how Jersey was portrayed in the past. She also realized how big a platform the ‘Housewives’ franchise was and how it could really help her spread her message of “knowing your own worth” worldwide.
“When you have a message that is just ‘oh, I just want to be famous,’ that to me does not mean anything. When you actually have a message of knowing your own worth, and rejection is protection, you have Siggy Flicker as a friend.”
Transitioning into a worldwide public figure was not difficult for Flicker as she has never been a private person. On her first episode of ‘Housewives,’ from season seven, Flicker appeared all bandaged from her recent facelift.
“I turned 50 this year, and Andy Cohen and people said to me, ‘Siggy, did you know you were going to be filming?’ I didn’t care if I was going to be filming. To me I cared about being real and for nothing to be phony except for a few body parts! Everything has to be authentic, because I always say you have to lead with your true and authentic self.”
As Flicker had every intention on spreading her positive vibes on ‘Housewives,’ she found herself incredibly emotional as she was seen crying in every episode as she felt a deep connection with each housewife and what they were going through.
“When people are in pain, I’m uncomfortable. So if someone is crying, I want to cry for them, I want to cry with them, I want to fix it.”
As Flicker tried to fix severed relationships between cast members, she realized it was not an easy feat as there was history made prior to Flicker’s addition to the show. As much positivity she tried to spread, Flicker most often was in the midst of difficult scenarios. Luckily, Flicker found comfort with housewife, Dolores Catania.
“Dolores is what I call an easy friend. When I’m with Dolores, it’s just very easy and natural because our chemistry works together. I’m so grateful for Dolores getting me through the season.”
As season eight of ‘Housewives’ began to film, the relationships among the women proved to be more challenging as the toxicity level of certain cast members rose to a new level.
“This show has exposed me to the consequences of being around people who lack compassion, empathy, and tolerance, a world I had never witnessed with such unfiltered brutality. These people are poison to your life,” Flicker added.
Regardless, Flicker focused on standing up for herself.
“There are a lot of sharks on this show and in life; people who circle around you as predators and are prepared to attack at any moment. I deal with these toxic sharks the same way I advise my clients how to deal with bullies. I practice what I preach and I do not back down.”
Flicker believes, “stand up for something and you will not fall for anything. By doing this, you will give hope to the next generation and they will live in a better world than we live today.”
When not on ‘Housewives’ cameras, Flicker is focused on spending time with her family, friends, and her motivational speaking engagements. Flicker is passionate on spreading her positive messages on life, love and relationships. She teaches women the true meaning of success and attributes her positive attitude to her mother.
“If I hang out with somebody who is successful, it means I am going to grow from that person. My mother always said to me, ‘hang out with people who are prettier, smarter, and brighter than you.’ I see a beautiful woman walking down the street and I yell, ‘you are so gorgeous!’ I like to make people’s day. I am not intimidated or jealous of anybody. If tomorrow God said, ‘Siggy, I have to reincarnate you and you can be anybody you want, my response would be Siggy Flicker. I don’t want to be anybody else.”
And how lucky are we that we have Siggy! Her love for her children is quite evident as seen on her social media accounts. She shares all her life including a duet with her daughter Sophie singing Keith Urban’s ‘Fighter,’ her son Joshua asking his girlfriend out to the prom, her romantic dates with her husband Michael Campanella, as well as using her platform to help promote her friends’ businesses. Flicker is completely willing to share her resources, and believes in the concept of everyone supporting each other and female empowerment. Despite those who let her down, she has not allowed the negativity of some to change her course.
“I have had people who I have been friends with in the past who have claimed they love me and were for me, but their actions proved otherwise. I had to make the decision to get rid of these toxic people in my life. It’s hard to do and I get very upset about it. I have learned to only surround myself with positive, high energy people who are for me and not against me.”
Flicker understands the concept of self-love and makes no excuses for it. When someone spreads negative energy in her life, she focuses on what is best for her.
“I have to be smart enough to say, this person right now is toxic in my life. I cannot be affiliated with this person at this time. Energies change. It could end up differently, but I’m about taking care of me first. Some people may say, ‘Siggy, you are all about yourself!’ You’re absolutely right. I believe in love yourself first, and everything else will fall into place.”
Very approachable, Flicker loves speaking in front of live audiences and opening up about her life. Audience members get to feel the energy of Flicker and there are no questions that are off the table.
“When you are taping, you’re taping for 18 hours. It’s an all day thing and you only see three minutes. You don’t really know what three minutes the viewers are going to see. When you are with a live audience, it’s bada-bing, bada-boom! We are all here. You are hearing my words, we are all in this together. I just thrive on it!”
To see and hear Flicker live, you have the opportunity to learn her “Siggyisms.” Flicker’s favorite, “a man’s rejection is God’s protection, and people who create their own drama, deserves their own karma!”
As Flicker continues her path of positivity, her goal is to host her own talk show to inspire and help people throughout the world. In the meantime, you can see Flicker on Bravo for season 8 of ‘Housewives’ being her true authentic self!
For more information on Siggy’s speaking engagements, visit http://www.SiggyFlicker.com.
You can also follow her on Instagram @Siggy.Flicker
Makeup: Lauren D’Amelio
Stylist: Melissa Polo Landau
Clothing: Reve Boutique
Hair: Salon Q2 (Sel)